Breaking News!

Another stick broken by The Menacing Traut this week in a Bald Bulls match. He reportedly took off his skate and tried to cut a guy. We also saw Cobra Kai's matchup against Mike Tyson. Yes friends, two heavyweights and nemesis from childhood video games and movies battled in the frosty oval in a game of epic proportions. The Tyson's took out Cobra Kai like Little Mac (just Wikipedia it if you didn't get it, I can't do all the work around here). The 5-4 matchup was marked by extreme violence and more than a few bruised egos. Take it easy out there, and remember you basically have knives attached to your feet.

This week also saw a win by the Golden Girls 2-1 over an unnamed opponent. Someday I will get better information on women's hockey (if you play women's hockey, please tell me about it!). Until I get better info, I have to assume the game was somewhat like a Mighty Ducks movie without the dudes.

B Team had by far the best ice time this week but a weak turnout. They call it the little B-Team that could.

A BLOWOUT on the ice this week as the Dead Presidents resurrected themselves to a 4-0 win over the headless horsemen. Fritz "#1 Stunna" F. spent some time in the penalty box for inappropriate behaviour. Word is he mistook the ice for a slip-n-slide. The end of the second period was described to this writer as similar to Ragnarok, since a viking berzerker mentality took hold of both teams (reportedly the heaviest combat was between "McCainiac" George of the DPs and "HW Bush" George of the HH). No valiant warriors were sent to Vallhalla that night, but a few goals were scored as tempers cooled.

Women's hockey had a dinner tonight, and the chicken reportedly may have been a little dry.

Until next time, this is your Tuck Hockey Fan saying "keep your stick on the ice." If you can name that quote without Googling it, I have a prize for you.